I don't believe in Reptilian Humanoids but my persona does. She hides this very blunt sword in my backpack when I'm not looking and unsheathes it at the most inappropriate moments. I do believe the reason this sword is blunt is because she misses so often and hits metro wagons and city utilities instead of Reptilian Humanoids, so that now it works more like a heavy bat than like a sharp edged sword.
I wake up in the mornings with bloody clothes and guts in my hair. There must be some way to stop her.
PS: this first appeared on Hatrack in a thread on Conspiracy Theories.
PSS: The sword's name is Sigil. Please refer to it as Ms. in any love letters you may be thinking of sending. Our Lady Of Asskick is also approapriate (for the sword, not for me, damnit!)